A Lost Parent
My Father passed away on April 4th, 2004 from pancreatic cancer. It’s been a tough few months and I’ve only just begun to recover from the shock of loosing a beloved parent.
Last November, he began to feel ill and slowly became jaundice. The doctor discovered that there was a growth blocking off his bile duct which in turn was causing his jaundice. They put in a stint to keep the duct from closing - getting rid of the jaundice. Sadly, we also found out that the growth was cancerous and that there was not much that could be done. The pancreas, which is where the cancer was located, is in a spot in the body where you just don’t have easy access for surgery. The easiest way to get to it is to remove one of the kidneys - which causes it’s own problems. We were told that Dad had between six and twelve months to live. There was the option of Chemotherapy - but he felt that it would make him too weak to enjoy the time he had left. It’s sad to say this, but we all knew at some level that he wasn’t going to survive.
Christmas was tough - yet exceptional - this past year. We had a lot of family around, including my Grandmother who came in from Dauphin. Dad and I spent a lot of time together and had some great heart to heart discussions. They revolved around so many topics - but the core theme was him telling me it would be okay - he’d always be there in spirit.
In February we all noticed that he was getting more fatigued. He wasn’t eating - partially due to the the food and subsequent digestion causing him severe pain. He was on copious amounts of morphine to help with that and to dull his pain in general. He continued to go down hill through February and March. Near the end of March he was in bed most of the time and so frail that he needed help getting up just to go to the bathroom.
Mom made the impossible call that we should move him into a hospice. The ambulance came and moved him on Monday, March 29th. He was at this point very weak and found it difficult to talk. It was tough watching him try to speak because you knew that he was in there, and he was trying so hard to stay strong for everyone.
He spent the last few days of his life at the Rosedale Hospice. The nurses there treated him exceptionally well - and looking back I am glad we were there instead of in a hospital - the atmosphere gave us all room to grieve.
Edward (Ted) Michael Hafichuk passed away the following Sunday, April 4th at 4pm with his mother and his wife tending to him. We all love you and miss you Dad, and hope you’re out there looking over us.
Tags: personal